Tuesday, September 9, 2008

Am I waiting for the other shoe to fall or is it really a turnaround?

Since I wrote about being discouraged last week, things have really been happening. Changing, mostly for the better.

I am cautiously optimistic. I am liking this change.

Which is not to say that there still aren't rotten things going on. My A/C unit, which happens to be upstairs in a little closet, is leaking and coming through my kitchen ceiling (which I just had fixed). I throw out a couple of the 5-gallon buckets of water every day. This is exasperating, because we just spent a little over $11,000 to get everything fixed and back to normal. Now that whole rigmarole will be starting again.

But, things are actually better and I am not freaking out about this mess (like I probably think I maybe should be).

On the job front, Carl was moved to a much better store. Sure it's further away and it's in Dallas, but he has much better people to work with and his salary will double because this store actually does business. It's in the Oak Lawn area of town and people there have disposable income and can pay for repairs on their cars. He works with another manager who appreciates his people skills and they work well as a team. Even Carl is happier in the mornings to go to work.

As for me, I had a good interview yesterday with a potential employer. This place would be perfect for me because it would be utilizing all my skills and it's only 3 miles from home. I can wear my jammies to work if I want - don't have to see anyone at all. It's all internet and phone. The money is a lot less, but I wouldn't have to spend money on gas or clothing or lunches - I could go home and see my puppies every day.

After months of waiting for our gas lease money to come through, we will finally be getting it this Thursday. We are one of the last families to get this bonus, because I bought my house before I married, and there were some issues there (my name had changed and Carl is not on the deed, etc.). But the good news is that this Thursday, we will get our bonus and will be able to get caught up on everything that has been hanging.

I believe I am finally clean of all Zoloft that had been in my system. I can't tell you how good I feel. I can sleep at night without grinding my teeth, and I sleep all the way through. No wake ups. I can cry when I feel sad, and I can totally belly laugh now when something strikes me as silly. I am a little sad that I missed out on FEELING things for almost three years, but I am happier that I am off the pills. And even with all the stress lately, I have not had a migraine. I hope I am not tempting fate, but I really have been feeling good.

There have been lots of prayers prayed for Carl and I, and I want to thank those of you who thought about us and lifted us up. Thank you to friends who have been there for us in thick and (really really) thin.

We believe that winds of change are blowing... where will it take us?


scriggle said...

I am so unbelievably happy for y'all I can't even describe it! I think this is a turn around towards great things. Yay!!!